Secretly Unstable

I have been told I am crazy, funny, a good cook, and a decent blogger. These are the expectations I am trying to live up to. Thank you.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

End of an Era

I blogged a lot about the early months of motherhood. (See http://sercetlyunstable.blogspot.com/2007_12_09_archive.html) A main focus of these blogs was breastfeeding. If you read then, or ever spoken to me about breastfeeding you know that Ruby and I had a tough time in the beginning. But practice, patience, and persistence paid off! Ruby is now 17 months and 1 week old. And we have ended our era of breastfeeding.

I can't believe we made it this far and I can't believe it is over. Bye bye worrying about drinking, mercury, and drugs (prescription that is.) Bye bye nursing bras and boppy pillow. (Although the boppy pillow is also awesome for the laptop computer.) Bye bye breastfeeding mother membership. I said bye bye to the breast pump 6 months ago, but bye bye none the less.

Nursing was such a big part of Ruby and my relationship. In the beginning Ruby nursed every two hours, basically for the first 6 months of her life that is what she lived off of. And until she was a year old it was still the main source of nutrition. Since it was such a big part of Ruby's development I took nursing very seriously. I probably stressed it too much, but really, can you expect me not to stress.

It is a bittersweet ending. On the one hand I am so happy to be done. I feel free. I am also proud that we were able to shift and evolve to a new era! (I had a huge fear that I wouldn't be able to get Ruby off the boob, ever.) On the other hand it is the ending of something special that only Ruby and I shared. Ruby is raised by me, Derek, the nanny, and our families. Everyone loves her. But I was the only one that could nurse her. This is what made it special for us. It was exclusively between her and I. Now it is over. I am trying to think of what is going to replace it, and I haven't figured it out just yet.

I think I am going to go back and read one of my early blogs about breastfeeding. I am sure it will be good for a laugh.